# Rewrite a landing page hero and test it with a 5-second check

> Scores your above-the-fold copy with a five-second clarity test, writes three rewrites from different angles, and holds them to the same test.

- **Author:** [Charlotte Bennett (@charlotte_bennett)](https://promptabide.com/charlotte_bennett)
- **Tested on:** Claude · Opus 5.5
- **You fill in:** `current_hero`, `what_it_does`, `visitor`, `goal`
- **Published:** 2026-08-06
- **Updated:** 2026-09-24
- **Tags:** `copywriting`, `marketing`, `web-development`, `startups`
- **Keywords:** rewrite landing page headline, landing page hero copy prompt, five second test landing page, improve saas homepage headline, landing page clarity check
- **Views:** 2069
- **Likes:** 25

**Best for:** Founders and marketers whose landing page gets traffic but not sign-ups, and who suspect the headline says nothing specific.

## Prompt

```
Here is the hero section of my landing page (headline, subheadline, button text, and anything else above the fold):

{{current_hero}}

What the product actually does, in plain words: {{what_it_does}}
Who lands on it: {{visitor}}
What I want them to do: {{goal}}

Step 1: Clarity check on my current version. Pretend you are that visitor with 5 seconds. Answer in one line each: What is this? Who is it for? What do I get? What do I click? Then score clarity 1-10 and name the single biggest problem.

Step 2: Write 3 rewrites, each taking a different approach: outcome-led, problem-led and mechanism-led. For each give a headline (max 10 words), subheadline (max 25 words), button text (2-4 words), and one line of proof to place near the button, using only proof that's already on my page.

Step 3: Run the same 5-second check on each rewrite and score it. Be as strict with your own versions as with mine.

Step 4: Recommend one and tell me what to A/B test it against.
```

## Variables

- `{{current_hero}}` — Your current above-the-fold copy, pasted as-is (e.g. Headline: The future of freelance finance is here)
- `{{what_it_does}}` — Plain description of what the product does (e.g. Tells freelancers how much of each client payment to set aside for taxes)
- `{{visitor}}` — Who arrives and from where (e.g. freelance designers and developers coming from a Google search)
- `{{goal}}` — The one action you want (e.g. start the free 14-day trial)

## Example input

```
current_hero:
Headline: The future of freelance finance is here
Subheadline: Ledgerly harnesses AI to streamline your workflow and empower you to focus on what matters most.
Button: Get started
Below button: Trusted by 2,000+ freelancers · Bank-level security · Integrates with Stripe, PayPal and Wise

what_it_does: Connects to your Stripe, PayPal and Wise accounts. Every time a client pays you, it tells you how much to move to a tax savings account, based on your federal and state estimates. Sends reminders before quarterly estimated tax deadlines.
visitor: freelance designers and developers arriving from a Google search for "how much to set aside for taxes freelance"
goal: start the free 14-day trial
```

## Output

*Produced by Claude · Opus 5.5.*

```
**Step 1: Your current hero**
- What is this? Unclear. "Freelance finance" could be invoicing, banking or accounting.
- Who is it for? Freelancers, broadly.
- What do I get? Nothing specific. "Streamline your workflow" isn't a benefit.
- What do I click? "Get started," but started on what?

**Clarity: 2/10.** Biggest problem: the visitor searched for how much to set aside for taxes, and nothing above the fold mentions taxes.

**Step 2: Rewrites**

**A. Outcome-led**
- Headline: Always know how much to save for taxes
- Subheadline: Every time a client pays you, Ledgerly tells you how much to move to your tax account, based on your federal and state estimates.
- Button: Start free trial
- Proof: Connects to Stripe, PayPal and Wise · Trusted by 2,000+ freelancers

**B. Problem-led**
- Headline: No more guessing what you'll owe in taxes
- Subheadline: Ledgerly watches your Stripe, PayPal and Wise payments, tells you what to set aside from each, and reminds you before quarterly deadlines.
- Button: Start 14-day trial
- Proof: Trusted by 2,000+ freelancers · Bank-level security

**C. Mechanism-led**
- Headline: Get paid, see exactly what to set aside
- Subheadline: Connect Stripe, PayPal or Wise. After each client payment, Ledgerly shows the amount to move for taxes and reminds you before quarterly deadlines.
- Button: Start free trial
- Proof: Bank-level security (it sits next to a button that asks people to connect financial accounts)

**Step 3: Five-second check on the rewrites**
- **A:** What: a tax-savings calculator. Who: people paid by clients. Get: the amount to save. Click: obvious. **8/10.** Loses a point for not saying "freelancer" and for leaving out the deadline reminders.
- **B:** The headline matches the searcher's worry closely, but on its own it could be an accountant or tax-prep service; the subheadline has to rescue it. **7/10.**
- **C:** Most concrete about how it works, but "set aside" without "for taxes" in the headline makes the visitor read on to understand it. **7/10.**

**Step 4: Recommendation**
Go with **A**. It answers the exact search in the headline and gets all four questions right in the first two lines. A/B test it against **B**, keeping the button and proof identical so the only variable is outcome versus worry framing. If you need a baseline, run your current hero as a control for one week, but don't let a 2/10 page keep half your traffic for long.
```

## Why it works

The **four five-second questions** (what, who, what do I get, what do I click) are a quick, repeatable test that exposes vague copy immediately. Supplying **what the product does in plain words** is essential: otherwise the model rewrites buzzwords into different buzzwords. Forcing **three distinct approaches** gives you real options instead of three synonyms. **"Be as strict with your own versions"** makes the model score its rewrites honestly rather than awarding itself 10/10, and restricting proof to **what's already on the page** keeps it from inventing testimonials.

## When not to use it

A model pretending to be a visitor is not user research. Use this to get better candidates, then test them with real visitors or a proper A/B test. If your page has deeper problems (wrong traffic, weak offer, broken sign-up flow), a better headline won't fix them. Skip it for brand-led pages where clarity isn't the main goal.

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